Silly questions I have been asked...

All completely true. Things people have asked me while on duty. If you are guilty, just blush and put your head down. Be ashamed.

1) Is that a REAL ambulance?
-No, it's fake. Gee, you caught me. The uniforms are rented, too. We just drive around picking up sick people for fun.

2) Can you refill my prescription?
-WOW, you know I completely forgot that the Greek translation for 'ambulance' is 'pharmacy.' No, I cannot refill your prescription. I can, however, punch you in the face for being a moron.

3) Do you get paid well to do this?
-Not exactly a silly question, but everyone asks. The answer is NO, we get paid horribly, but most of us do it because we love it. So be nice.

4) Can I smoke in here?
-Yea, I don't see a problem with that. Except for that big bottle of flammable oxygen right behind you.

5) Can I smoke before we leave?
-Really? If you have the energy to stand outside my ambulance and have a cigarette before we take you to the E.R., you should probably drive yourself.

6) Can we stop and get something to eat really quick?
-No. Seriously? No.

7) Are you the fire department?
-Yep. We hide the hoses and ladders to trick people. Shhhh! Don't tell anyone!

8) Can you turn the lights and sirens on?
-Again, not such a silly question. But if you're able to sit up and ask me, then no, we can't turn them on. You're fine.

9) Can you hear the sirens inside the ambulance?
-(This wasn't asked to me, but I heard about it and cried I was laughing so hard.)
No, YOU can hear them 3 miles away, but I can't hear them when they're going off 3 ft. away from my face.

10) (Asked by a passerby while I was at station)
What is it, exactly, that you guys do here?
-(I turn around, staring at the 10 AMBULANCES parked in the parking lot, look down at myself in my uniform that has 'EMT' in big red letters on the back...)
Ice cream trucks. Are you that retarded?